Kate O'Leary Interview You Are Enough

In this candid interview, Andrea Urquhart, host of the Strengthen Live Podcast, interviews entrepreneur, Mental Health First Aid trainer, speaker, and educator, Kate O'Leary as she shares about her journey so far as a professional wellbeing specialist. 

Hear about the highs and lows of founding a wellbeing business, and how Kate's ADHD diagnosis took her on a journey of courage and clarity.

Kate delivers practical, trauma-informed mental health education in corporate settings, schools, and community programmes—helping people develop real-world tools to support their mental health, not just for themselves, but for those around them.

She's passionate about making mental health conversations practical, relatable, and part of everyday life—because, as Kate believes, the right knowledge, at the right time, can change everything.

Where to connect with Kate:

https://www.wellbeingfirstaid.com/

Follow her company on LinkedIn

Or connect directly with Kate on LinkedIn.

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Transcript

Welcome to the Strengthen Live Podcast! I'm your host, Andrea Urquhart. This is the place for trailblazing, empathetic leaders who are also recovering people pleasers! If you have a big heart and your passion is supporting others to change their lives for the better, find home and belonging here.

Our guest today, Kate, knows first-hand what it’s like to juggle ambition with self-doubt. Like many empathic leaders, she poured her energy into supporting others while struggling to prioritise herself—until repeated panic attacks forced her to stop and rethink everything she thought she knew about mental health and wellbeing.

After two decades in marketing for some of the UK’s biggest brands, Kate had built a successful career—but behind the scenes, she was battling anxiety, imposter syndrome, and the relentless pressure to ‘prove’ her worth. That first panic attack helped her realise that something had to change. That realisation led her to retrain as a counsellor and dedicate her career to mental health education.

Now, as an entrepreneur, Mental Health First Aid trainer, speaker, and educator, she delivers practical, trauma-informed mental health education in corporate settings, schools, and community programmes—helping people develop real-world tools to support their mental health, not just for themselves, but for those around them too.

She’s passionate about making mental health conversations practical, relatable, and part of everyday life—because, as Kate believes, the right knowledge, at the right time, can change everything.

Kate, welcome to the podcast! I'm so excited to have you here!

I'm excited to be here. Thank you so much for having me Andrea. I have to say, I've got imposter syndrome even listening to you read out my bio!

Your bio is incredible! Your personal story that you share, because you don't just share that as part of your bio, you share that in the training that you give as well don't you?

Yeah, I try to be authentically myself, and because I'm in mental health, I like to try to break down the stigma. So I'm really honest, authentic about my experiences, because if you walk into a room and the first thing the person, you know the head of the room, the trainer, the expert, the "perceived expert", if they immediately talk about the struggles that they've had then it sets the scene for the day or days.

Thank you so much for agreeing to come on the Strengthen Live podcast. This is the very first interview that I've done on the podcast because usually it's me talking and sharing insights and things. But I really wanted these episodes to have a showcase feel but also to be really candid and open as I just chat with people who I know have been working on their relationship with themselves alongside growing their business.

So, thank you so much for joining me today Kate. How are you feeling?

Aw I'm really nervous but I'm okay. Thank you so much for having me. This is an honour. 

You know, I've worked with you before and I've really taken a lot from our work together so I'm really, really grateful that I'm the first person. I feel honoured. Thank you.

Ah, it was actually a no brainer. I was like, "I would really like to interview Kate!"

So, amazing work that you're doing, obviously working with people on mental health first aid and some quite deep mental health issues that people are struggling with. 

What's the most rewarding thing about the work that you do? Or maybe there's not just one thing. What are the rewarding things?

Oh my gosh! There's so much that's rewarding. Obviously, I'm really lucky. The term that people use to describe the way that I work is a portfolio career or something like that. I have different aspects to my work. Each different aspect to my work comes with a different reward.

I have an ADHD diagnosis, so I like variety and novelty and they really help me with that so I find it stimulating. I was having a think about this about the type of things that I find rewarding - and there's so much.

One is that I help people, and not just to help themselves but to help others and that I find extremely rewarding. Witnessing transformation, so seeing people go from experiencing poor mental health to actually feeling they can honour themselves. I find working with young people is so rewarding.

And then, I think weirdly, one that took me by surprise is the amount of feedback that I get. I find that really rewarding because I'm able to learn and grow through that and there's just so much that helps me. It really, really helps me.

So I've seen on LinkedIn that you share the feedback that you get from people, and especially from the young people that you work with because I know that you work in schools with young people who've really had some quite big challenges. And also, I've been privileged to see some of the content that you prepare for them, the lessons and things. I can remember looking at that and just being absolutely blown away.

I guess that impact on young people's lives, how does that feel for you?

It's hugely motivating, and you know obviously no offence to any of the adults that I work with but working with young people is just so much more fun! I absolutely love it, they're just bags of fun!

And the rewarding, so I have a notice board that's just behind where I sit where you can see me now but I took a few bits of paper off because I wasn't sure if this was something that would come up. I'm going into high schools and secondary schools and talking to them about their wellbeing and their mental health. And as part of that session, at the end, I often ask people to make a commitment to their mental health. I print out these slips, small third of A4 slips that people can put their name on and put their commitment on and sometimes they'll give it back to me and sometimes they'll keep it and put it somewhere that's important to them. 

And the kind of things that these young people write, it literally fills me. It helps me to carry on what I'm doing. So this person wrote: Do what works for me. And I just find that's amazing, isn't it?  So that's the  session where a young persons realises that the things that work for others aren't necessarily the things that work for them and that they can find coping strategies that work really well for them. 

And I think that is the game changer and I find that really rewarding that will change a young person's life. The thing that I find the most rewarding about working with young people is that often when I go in to work with schools the young people who have been allocated to me or put in my sessions, labelled, indirectly, labelled as being "difficult" or naughty. 

Of course, actually when you get to know them, they're not difficult or naughty, they've just had a really tough time. Being someone to be there to help them listen to themselves, it's probably the thing that I needed when I was younger. I just find that amazing and really rewarding. So yeah, I keep some of these notes near me because I find that really motivating. 

I'm super lucky to do what I get to do, right? In that respect, and I know that it's a privilege and I feel really grateful to do that.

Ah, that's amazing!

I think there's a couple of things that really stand out for me there, and one of them is the way that you actually get them to make a commitment and actually write something down. And the other is that I know that, in your practice, that you collect feedback and you said earlier about the feedback motivates you and the feedback also helps you to do what you do better. 

Just an observation myself from working with lots of different professionals in the wellbeing space is that often people are asking for feedback so that they can share it, you know, like a testimonial on LinkedIn or something, but you use feedback in a very different way. You use feedback to help you in your own practice but also the feedback is a way of your clients, and the young people that you work with, being asked to reflect on the steps and the progress that they're making and I think that it's just an amazing and really healthy and authentic approach - brilliant!

Thank you. There's another part of feedback, I guess, that hasn't always been as helpful. As part of my training sessions, my work that I do with Mental Health First Aid training, you routinely have to ask for feedback, right? So you're describing, I need those testimonials to carry on with my work and of course I do share them.

The thing, interestingly enough, that's been so rewarding, and has turned into something new for me, is that when I first started out, I really found that feedback to be validating and affirming, and I need it to be able to encourage me and to keep going. As opposed to sharing it, but more for myself and my own confidence because I felt like such an imposter.

At that time, if I didn't get 10 out of 10 or I didn't get the top marks, and you know, being good and that I'd done something wrong, I guess, that I perceived as wrong, it would just be heartbreaking. It would just be shattering for me and it would really knock me for a day or two and I would have to come back and recover from that.

And now, I see that differently now. I've learnt to see that differently, just from the sheer volume and the repetitive nature and the consistently getting feedback. While at the beginning it can be scary, it can hurt, kind of wounding almost because you take it quite personally. But now every bit of feedback I get helps me to just get better at what I do. So, I just can't wait. 

Yes of course, the great feedback feels like a little hug. But also having the additional opportunities to learn and to be better at what I do. Yes, it's helped me. It's been a real blessing. I wish at times I didn't lean into  or crave that validation, that affirmation because obviously that causes you to feel self-doubt or worries. 

But really it's becoming such a rewarding aspect of my work because now I know that I'm constantly considering constructive feedback. Yeah, that feels like a privilege as well, that I can get better and better. It's just an opportunity to get better and better all the time, and I enjoy it - which I never thought I'd say!

I love that, I love that your relationship with feedback is changing and it just reminds me of some of the things that I mentioned in one of the previous episodes on rejection recoil and things because you mentioned that you have ADHD as well. So that relationship, as a professional, with feedback isn't something that you've shied away from even though you felt it very personally and you've made it something really constructive.

So what character strengths, Kate, have you had to draw on in the day to day growth of your business practice? So I think, sometimes people separate "Oh, what do I need to do to grow my business?" and they think it's about do, do, do. 

And yet, our relationship with ourselves impacts our relationship with our business and I know that the people who I know who are successful in growing their business really learn to lean into their own character strengths.

So, I just wondered if you could speak to that and tell us some of the things, obviously you've really shared about your humility in terms of learning the feedback journey. But what other character strengths do you feel that you've leaned into as well?

Well, I was thinking about this question because you were obviously kind enough to give me the questions in advance and I was thinking about this: "Oh, I might struggle with this one, I don't know how to talk about my strengths!"

But I started looking back through some of the things that people have said about me, my clients have said about me and the things that I've leaned into as well, and I did a bit of reflection.

I guess the first thing I want to say is, I'm someone who's transferred career. I've moved from being in marketing where I felt like I was confident and I knew what I was doing. I guess, after 20years doing that you sort of feel like "Yeah, I know what I'm doing". And then I moved into a career where I didn't feel like I knew what I was doing, I just felt like an imposter. 

I just want people to know that actually, if you're struggling with imposter syndrome, I want you to remember that you're not starting from scratch and that if you move careers that you are just applying what you already know and what you already do really well in a different way and in a different environment. And that took me a while to work out, I didn't realise that.

But broadly, of those things that I was applying in a different way, my relationship building and collaboration skills that I'd built in my career in marketing, you know, just leveraging those. And I didn't realise, it's just been one of the biggest strengths that I've drawn on in my business is my ability to form friendships, form strong relationships. And whilst that has been consistent through every single job I've ever had, whatever career that might be, I know that sometimes people can really struggle with imposter syndrome and think that they're starting from scratch and that none of their skills are transferrable. 

But that was completely transferrable for me. Those relationship building skills. I've been able to build authentic relationships, authentic relationship with clients, that have helped me to really maintain long term client relationships, like a really strong network that feels authentic to me with people that I really get on with. And that is really rewarding isn't it?

I the other things that I thought about as well were things like integrity. I had to make some really tough decisions about turning down work that didn't align to my values, even when I needed the money. You know? Even when I actually could have done with the money. 

But when you work in mental health, I hate saying things like this, but it's true, you know, you come across people that maybe just wanna do maybe a tick box exercise or they want to use your work to do something that could potentially be damaging to their employees or harmful. You know, like this resilience, keep going no matter what and I'm like "No! That is not what I'm about. Don't do that!"

And so, I've had to stick to my values and it hasn't been easy.

I was thinking about courage as well. When it comes to being an entrepreneur, I just think courage isn't really optional. It's a necessity! I'd love to say obviously that I've always been fearless  in my business  but of course I haven't. And the reality is that there's been plenty of times where I've thought "I just can't do this and what if I fail?" 

I've really considered giving up at times but I've really leant into my supervision or my other support network, my people around me and got to a point where I'm like feel the fear and do it anyway. When I say courage, it's not that I've not been scared. I have been scared, I've been nervous and I've been frightened to go into things or frightened to say yes to things. 

But of course it's just about showing up anyway isn't it? You just have to feel it and I doubt myself, but I carry on anyway - I just move forward! So I think that's been key for me still being here.

I mean, I'm only a few year in and I think  people say that the first few years are like the most difficult and I definitely found that courage has been the strength I had to lean into.

Actually, I listened to your episode on humility and high growth humility that you had, and it was something I hadn't really realised that it's a strength that maybe I have. I do really agree with you that it's been one of the biggest things that's helped me grow my business; not pretending that I've got all the answers, not pretending that I'm the expert.

There is an example of when I met a client early on, in the work that I did with young people, and I'm not a qualified teacher. And I really felt like "Oh am I the right person for this? Should I really be doing this?" and I even said it and voiced my fears to my client at that particular time. And I think that was humility in action really, and I was really blown away by the reply because they said: "You really connect with these young people and that's most of the battle when it comes to trying to teach young people things, and especially when it comes to how to take care of themselves. So  we think, we believe in you, we think you can do a really good job at this because you've really demonstrated that so far."

And so that really helped me just to do better and feel comfortable in the work and it was that humility I suppose of saying "You know, maybe I need advice" or asking people like you, yeah just knowing that I'm not absolutely the expert has been helpful. That has helped me, weirdly, in a way that I wouldn't have expected about not being competitive. I don't know, there's something about this high growth humility when I heard you describe it, and I was like yeah, it's helped me to see my fellow Mental Health First Aid Trainers and other people that who work in a similar industry as me, not as my competition, and if I wasn't as humble about the fact that I don't know everything and I'm not the expert, I wouldn't have formed some of the relationships that I have now with those people. They are like my support network.

That kind of humility has really allowed me to grow, I think.

Even when I first started becoming a Mental Health First Aid Trainer, I just went up to the trainer at the end of the session, and I said: "How do I get your job? This is amazing! What you do is incredible! Help me to do this as well!"

Even that in itself is a little bit of humility, I suppose. I didn't really realise. A lot of people think that asking for help is a weakness but in reality, I think it's probably the reason a lot of us are still standing in business, you know.

Yeah, definitely. I love that whole perspective that you've brought there, also that just being humble about the fact that we need other people and that we don't have to do it on our own and by ourselves. It is definitely, so key.

So you've shared honestly and openly about some of the things that you've found difficult and that you've grown through and that you still work through as well. Is there any one thing that you've found particularly challenging personally as you've stepped up in our business to grow.

Oh yeah! I mean, I'm not going to lie! I find this section the easiest to talk about. You know I find this area of challenge the easiest bit. I was like, "Yes, there were many challenges and I could talk for a long time, another podcast length about those!"

I think, initially what I didn't foresee was struggling with routine and structure as an entrepreneur I guess. I really had to lean into systems that work for me as opposed to against me. I found when I worked in a corporate 9 to 5, that I found that to be suffocating and I couldn't wait to get out of it.

And then, over time, I was like "Oh there were some benefits to that actually!" There was!

You know I really struggled having that. When you work for yourself there is no-one telling you what time to get to work and what time you have to stay till and which job you have to finish. And that is quite overwhelming, even though it sounds like it's going to be freeing, I found it really overwhelming. 

And I  had to really learn how to create a structure that really works for me - that was flexible, because I'm a bit more of a night time person as opposed to an early bird. You know, I just really had to realise that my routine is not about rigidity, but it's about clarity. It's about knowing when I work best and adapting to that, and making sure that I build my business around that. Yeah, that's been helpful.

But other thing that helps me as well in terms of that structure and routine, helped me to realise it was okay to advocate for myself as well. I was working with a really important client - you know, sometimes, maybe I would have had a tendency to people please and to just say yes to anything that they asked me. And over time, because I needed this structure and I needed this routine and I work in a certain way and I wanted to adapt to that to help them get the best out of me. I was able to say to my client "You know, I work really well like this." You know, and I think I remember wording it in a really clumsy way the first time I said it but I sort of said:

" I'm the kind of person who gets my energy and motivation and I like the pressure of what could be perceived as the last minute to some people but for me, it isn't the last minute, it's actually the right time to do it. And I've been researching, I've been gathering, I've been processing and right at the last minute it all comes together. So, is it okay if I send you the slides just an hour beforehand?"

And they were like: "Yeah, absolutely, it's totally fine!"

Whereas if I hadn't have done that I would have been worrying that they wanted them the night before or they would have asked for them the day before, not realising the impact on me. 

So yeah, that struggling with routine sort of led me to be able to advocate for myself, weirdly. We talked a lot about imposter syndrome being a challenge, so that was huge.

I guess the social media aspect, I really struggled with. Confidence because sometimes, you know, I think I had this imperfection type thing I guess. It comes with ADHD as well but I just used to find posting on social media about my work so difficult. Especially when you lack confidence about what you're doing. You know, you don't want to show up and one of my values is authenticity, so I don't want to show up and say "Oh my gosh! Look how amazing I am!" when I don't feel like that.

That felt difficult, that felt like a real challenge, worrying if the things I posted were going to be seen as not good enough or that people would judge me. I went into Facebook's head office when I was in marketing and there's this humungous poster and I took a photo of it: Done is better than perfect.

You know people will have heard it so many times. There's sometimes where you hear it and then you really hear it, you know when you hear it in a different way!

So now I over-analyse less and I just focus on connection rather than perfection. My audience doesn't need polished, fake content. They just need honesty and authenticity, that's why they tend to connect. I just try to remind myself that the right people will connect with me.

I could keep going about the struggles that I've had! So stop me! 

No, it's all great! 

I find that so fascinating, and I think that the people who are listening will also find that really helpful. It's really interesting that you've just described your journey about clarity and structure and making it work for you because we're often sold, again on social media, you have these people saying "Oh, become a this, become a that, work from anywhere, have the life you want!" And it makes it seem like, well, you know, if people swallow that, it makes it seem like oh, you can just sit by a pool and do your work and then rock up and do your speaking engagement somewhere.

You do see that, you see creating that kind of a post. But you've just really described that journey so well, of a journey to clarity, a journey of understanding yourself.

So I wanted to ask you about your ADHD diagnosis because I know that that came quite early on in your business. How did discovering yourself again through that lens, or understanding, or reality of being ADHD impact your relationship with your business or your relationship with yourself?

Hugely, actually, and that routine and that structure is one of those points. I was about six months into starting the business, maybe a bit less, but when I really realised how much this lack of structure and routine was really impacting me. And it was one of the factors that kind of got me to a point of self diagnosis, I guess. 

And you've probably will have seen some of the stats or worked with many clients similar to me. We get to a certain age and things change and, I'm 42 which is early for perimenopause which was highly linked to my diagnosis of ADHD. Diagnosis of women in their late 30s and early 40s is up thousands of percent because we've really understood now the symptoms and how it impacts people. But what was happening is that that lack of structure  was impacting me  more than maybe it would another business owner,  another female entrepreneur. The oestrogen levels that were declining were causing any underlying symptoms that may have been there to be more impactful and to be causing more problems for me.

And so the fact that I had changed from having so much routine and structure and now having to give it to myself was massive. It was humungous for me. If I hadn't of had that diagnosis, I wouldn't have understood. I wouldn't have had the compassion for myself. 

What it really did for me was I started to be able to speak my own language, and that was so freeing. That was the thing that gave me the real freeing experience, not the lack of routine and structure from getting away from the 9 to 5. It was the understanding myself. It gave me the ability to advocate for myself in that way. I started to get to know myself , what I needed and how I work and that really was the lens at which I could move forward form there.

You know, running a business is such an emotional rollercoaster, isn't it?

Definitely!

And no-one really prepares you for that. And when you're ADHD, your emotions can feel overwhelming. Some days when you feel like you're smashing it and you're making a difference, and some days you're like, well, I'm just about to have a panic attack!

It just isn't the same. So that kind of ADHD, knowing myself, understanding myself, having different tools that may work for me as opposed to others. It was a huge challenge but became something that helps me succeed I guess.

Trying to be what others expect is exhausting, and the more I leaned into my own way of doing things, the more successful my business became.

Thanks so much for sharing so honestly as well, because again, I think that people underestimate just how much our relationship with ourselves and understanding ourselves impacts our journey as entrepreneurs or business owners. It's a huge, huge part of it.

It's just great to have this conversation together and to hear the journey that you've been on but also to hear the place that you've come to. And I love that you're not sitting here going "Oh yeah, and this isn't a problem anymore and this isn't a problem anymore!" but you're actually talking about "This is something I've grown through, this is how I manage this now, I'm aware of this", and also, there things that you're saying that isn't so much of a problem anymore because your relationship, not just with yourself, but your relationship with the problem or the challenge has changed as well as you've grown. 

It's lovely to hear, and you know, I think really encouraging to everyone listening to hear and know about.

So, throughout this interview and in the bio we mentioned your portfolio aspect of your business, that you do counselling, that you're a trainer, that you also speak on stage at events. I've seen some of the clips of those, I would love to hear you live! From everything I know of you, I know that it must be really, really impactful.

Is there anything new or particular that you'd like to share with us about?

There is always loads going on - that's because, as I said, because I'm ADHD, there's always a lot happening! 

I am in the mix at the moment of picking up a long term partnership with a new client, like a membership community that is mostly made up of men. For me, that is where the urgency is, in mental health. Men's mental health is at crisis point right now. Most people who take their own lives are men.

You know, I really want to get under the skin of being able to help people, and this really helps. I'm someone who wants to make a difference in my work, and having this client and this programme will be transformational.

Also, on a personal level, I am currently waiting for my dissertation results. My counselling degree is imminent, I hope! So that's coming up. All good!

I'm also working on developing a programme for young people. Like I said, the work I do with young people really fills me, it really fills me up. I have developed a person-centred 12week programme and I'm working alongside a bigger client to get some funding, to get some grant funding to be able to do that, to be able to make that happen, and I'm really excited about that. So I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that that comes through.

I suppose, I don't know, this probably sounds a bit funny, but I sort of sometimes have in my mind this kind of caricature of myself as a little bit of a Robin Hood. I will work with larger corporates in order to help me do this charity work in order to help me to do the small charity focus work and the things that I love with young people. So, I've got both in the fire at the moment and that really is exciting.

So, if people want to connect with you and follow you're work, find out more, or even get in touch with you. where can they find you?

So my website is wellbeingfirstaid.com and I'm on Instagram and Facebook @wellbeingfirstaid and also on LInkedIn which is probably where my biggest community is. If you search Kate O'Leary wellbeing on LinkedIn then you'll find me.

So yeah, people can sign up for a Mental Health First Aid Course, they could ask me questions about workshops, employee workshops, wellbeing workshops, or they could get me to come into their school and talk to their students, or talk to me about programmes for young people including their wellbeing and their health. All sorts of things, so yeah, get in touch.

 Brilliant! Thank you so much. So, finally, Kate then, if you had one thing that you would like to say to anybody listening out there today who is maybe an emerging leader or somebody who is growing their professional wellbeing practice, what would you like to say to them?

You are already enough, keep going.

If you're doubting yourself, if you're feeling like you're not expert enough or qualified enough or that someone else is doing better than you, just know that you're not alone. Anyone who does any kind of meaningful work, which often is driven by empathy, like your audience, they're going to have felt that way before.

You don't have to be perfect to be valuable. You don't have to show up and have it all figured out. What you bring, your lived experience, authentically being you, your perspective, the way that you connect with people, whatever work you do - that's enough.

And of course, we do get stuck, right. And if you do feel stuck, keep learning. You know, like you said in the bio, this is one of the things why I'm in mental health education, just keep learning, just keep finding out stuff, developing your knowledge around the area that you're interested in, what you're passionate in or what you work in.

Because I genuinely, genuinely believe that the right knowledge at the right time can just change everything, so keep going, keep learning and trust that you are exactly where you're meant to be and that you're enough.

You don't have to have all the answers to make a difference, but if you keep learning, you'll always have something valuable to offer.

Totally! Kate, thank you so much for being my guest here today, and just for your openness and your honesty and obviously I wish you all the best with all of these projects that you've got moving forward, and I'm really looking forward to seeing more about all of those as you share them on LinkedIn.

Thank you so much. Thank you for having me, Andrea, I really appreciate it. It's been a pleasure.